Remembering our Departed Loved Ones

Every 1^st to the 2^nd of November yearly, Filipinos would visit departed loved ones at various memorial parks and cemeteries. Customarily, the occasion is being observed nationwide by surviving family members taking with them flowers and candles as offering to their departed loved ones. 

Those with bigger family members visiting would have tents. The tents are to protect themselves from the bright sunlight at daytime. Likewise shield from possible rain as they vigil overnight.

Family members would bring food for them to partake during the visit. In some memorial parks, fast food operators would take advantage of business opportunity. They cater food to the family members who do not have time to prepare food. It is a family reunion to most Filipinos as they gather together at the resting place of their departed loved ones.

Most of us prefer to visit on the 1^st of November, being All Saints Day, some would visit the 2^nd being the All Souls Day. It is also acceptable if we visit early to avoid the traffic jam.  In my case, I prefer to visit my parents resting place before the 1^st of November.  Prior to the occasion, family members would clean up the tomb, freshen up with new coats of paints and make sure the epitaph on the head stone are readable.  For those who can afford to pay, they would hire someone to do the job.

Despite the influence of Western culture that is celebrating Halloween. Most of us Filipinos would spend for candles and flowers for our departed loved ones rather than spending for Halloween parties.  Due to some imposition from private offices and shopping malls some of us are hook up on preparing costumes for Halloween.  I have nothing against those who celebrate Halloween parties. But, to be honest I do not like to see grotesque figures of dead people, zombies and the like.   It is not that I am scared of them but for me it connotes negativism.

I am glad that majority of us, Filipinos do not really buy the idea of Halloween parties. Rather continue the cultural tradition of spending money and time in remembrance of our departed loved ones. This tradition has been handed down from generation to generation all over the Philippines. This occasion in addition to Christmas brings Filipinos together as a family

Remembering our Departed Loved Ones

Every 1^st to the 2^nd of November yearly, Filipinos would visit departed loved ones at various memorial parks and cemeteries. Customarily, the occasion is observed nationwide by surviving family members taking with them flowers and candles as offering to their departed loved ones. Those with bigger family members visiting would have tents. The tents are to protect themselves from the bright sunlight at daytime. Likewise shield from possible rain as they vigil overnight.

Family members would bring food for them to partake during the visit. In some memorial parks, fast food operators would take advantage of business opportunity. They cater food to the family members who do not have time to prepare food. It is a family reunion to most Filipinos as they gather together at the resting place of their departed loved ones.

Most of us prefer to visit on the 1^st of November, being All Saints Day, some would visit the 2^nd being the All Souls Day. It is also acceptable if we visit early to avoid the traffic jam.  In my case, I prefer to visit my parents resting place before the 1^st of November.  Prior to the occasion, family members would clean up the tomb, freshen up with new coats of paints and make sure the epitaph on the head stone are readable.  For those who can afford to pay, they would hire someone to do the job.

A Visit to Remember

Despite the merry makings and hassles of traffic jam, they have not been forgotten. I visited our parents resting place 27th of Dec. I was amazed by some people who were already at the place even before I arrived. I was at the place at around seven in the morning. Children were happily chasing some butterflies with mommies and nannies running after the restless tots. Some visitors brought with them their breakfast and happily munching under a wide umbrella shielding them from the bright sunlight. Yes, folks, it was a warm day that day! I had to leave after at least an hour of visit. 

Feast of the Saints

Filipinos trouped to  memorial parks to celebrate the feast dedicated to our departed loved ones. The nationwide celebration started as early as the 30^th of October and will end until around the 1^st week of November. Although multitudes visit on the 1^st of November, others like me prefer to visit early to avoid traffic jam.  The traffic jam I am referring to is not on the roads but inside the memorial park.

I left home at around seven in the morning, the 31^st of October. I ate heavy breakfast as I planned to stay for several hours. The plot where my parents were laid to rest is just beside the pathway. It makes it easier to locate if anyone of our relatives would like to visit. I was surprised to meet the family of the lady buried to the right of my parents. The family erected a tent good for about ten people complete with small chairs and small table. I met the husband and one of the daughters of the lady, years ago.  They recognized me, and apologized for the space their tent had occupied. 

The family members started partaking their lunch. The old gentleman offered me a plate of rice, with my favorite Filipino dish abodo and a piece of fried stuffed bangus fish. I felt full, but I do not want to frustrate the old guy who offered me the sumptuous lunch. I told them I got lucky that day for the shade of the tent and the sumptuous lunch. They left at almost noon time. It was when they left I realized the scorching heat of the sun without the tent. 

 All went well during my visit. The weather cooperated, it was a sunny day. I left the memorial park at almost two in the afternoon.  I left behind two candles and basket of flowers I brought for my parents.  I mentioned the items to the care taker, so the children should leave them alone.  I went to the grocery for some household stuff before heading home. I was granted one day birthday leave, the 30^th. The 31^st of October and the 1^st of November were my day off. I was home at around five in the afternoon. After a cold bath, I slept soundly for seven hours.

London Lad

This is the very first photo my nephew posted a day after he arrived in London. This was taken from his cell phone by a friend.  Funny, when he was on his way to UK we were anxious monitoring him on Facebook.

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When the plane landed in Doha Qatar, he posted a comment he is in Qatar already for the connecting flight to London. We, his close relatives commented on his post. Some of his friends replied on his post too.  The next post we read was he was about to sleep, already in London. The following day, the post was he was watching rugby in South Wimbledon with some friends. 

A Day to Remember

Yesterday, Feb 5 is the 85^th birthday of my late father.  I went to the memorial park to bring flowers and candle.  My parents were laid to rest in the same place. The memorial park is not close to my house. I do not visit my parents too often. Except if there is occasion. I am a bit guilty for not visiting them last Christmas as I used to do. Despite the difference of the place where they are now, we still belong to one family.

I was amazed by the number of people at the memorial park. Cars were neatly parked at the designated parking spaces. Family members were having lunch together under the shade of a huge picnic umbrella. Some children were running around to probably ease their boredom or simply just to play. Are you not wondering how quickly children could invent a game on any occasion? 

Make It Short and Simple

Thursday and Friday are my day off from work. Oh, yes I am back to work for the info of my blogger friends. I will write a separate story on how it happened, soon. I had a chance of reading some blogs.

What caught my attention are blog topics about relationships. A.K.A – Tips and recommendations how relationship would work and last in the days ahead. I read many kinds books about this topic. It seems all of them have same recommendations. Why not simply point out the simple ways how relationship would work? Here are what I have to say. -

1. Be a responsible partner – Relationship is partnership. Be it among family members or among friends.
2. Shun white slavery – Strong words but I simply mean abuse in relationship. You should know when to take control of the situation. Most of those who knew me personally, know I am easy to please. I seldom complain. But when I sense something is amiss. I distance myself or let the other person know, it takes two to tango.
3.  Avoid complicated relationship – Life has so many challenges. You may not be strong enough to handle the pressure.

The Essence of Christmas

Christmas fever had subsided a bit. What were probably left under your Christmas tree are empty boxes and empty gift bags. These are proofs of fun and excitement for the whole family. While your ref is still loaded with ham, pasties, all sorts of food stuff. Some are presents from your neighbors, office mates and some friends who believed giving food stuff is sign of abundance. Some Filipino families believed, when you have plenty of food at this time of the year. You will never go hungry the following year.

My 11 years old niece and cousins from her mommy side.

While my nieces and family kids are enjoying stuffs we could afford to give them. I felt sad for children roaming around the streets of Manila asking for some coins passersby could give them. Their presence actually reminded me of my childhood. I had to share a doll with my sister. My father could not afford to buy each one of us toys. My older brother got a little lucky. He enjoyed a toy all to himself. There was several years gap between my sister and my youngest brother. When our youngest brother was born, my sister and I would spare some of our school allowance so Santa Claus could fill the plastic bag he would hang on Christmas Eve. He liked the plastic bag because he wants bigger gifts that will not fit into a sock.

Christmases had changed when we all graduated from college, found jobs. My siblings had married. Both our parents are not with us physically to open their Christmas presents. I know from where they are, and if given a chance to say – hello from heaven. - They would be happier to see everyone of our family member has gifts for everybody and still enjoying the spirit of giving. The essence of Christmas! ♥

A Festive Family Gathering

I visited my parents again Sunday the 7^th, at the memorial park. I thought of seeing the caretaker of my parents plot for his allowance. The caretaker is on his early fifties who earn his living, taking care of the plots at the memorial park. I did not see him last 25^th of Oct, the last time I visited. Being a Sunday and a week after All Souls Day, the memorial park was full of visitors taking time off from household chores to visit their loved ones. Or I guess like me they did not have time to visit last 1^ST of Nov. I was at work then.

For some families who have cars either they visit early, prior to All Souls Day celebration to have a good parking slot. Or, visit after the occasion. For a fee, tents are provided by the memorial park with matching chairs and a table. The park was on festive mood that started early Sunday morning. As described to me by my parents caretaker. Since night vigils are no longer allowed by the memorial park after All Saints Day and All Souls day. The visiting family members stayed from early morning to late afternoon.  Packed lunch, water and juices were among those prepared for a day vigil.

Upon arriving at the park, a boy around I guess four years old was crouched with pout lips trying to blow a candle. His older sister was giggling as she tried to stop him. The boy probably thought the candle had to be blown like the candle on his birthday cake. The candles placed on the headstones or anywhere near the departed loved ones have to be left lighted.  Soon as extinguished, they have to be replaced until all the visiting family members decided to go home. Of course, beautiful floral arrangements are likewise laid on same places.

The Philippines is composed of several regions and ethnic groups that may differ, in honoring and showing love to departed loved ones. One thing sure is Filipinos attachment to their families, living or those in the after lives.  ♥

All Souls Day VS Halloween

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Except for those homes located in posh villages, offices, and shopping malls. Halloween is not a great festivity in the Philippines. Most Filipinos would rather be at memorial parks and cemeteries to be with their departed loved ones. We visit departed loved ones on All Saints Day and All Souls Day, bringing candles and flowers. To some, just to avoid traffic jams, they visit as early as a week before or on the 31^th of Oct or 2^nd of Nov.

All Souls Day is the 2^nd of Nov. following All Saints Day. In the Philippines, however, we celebrate All Souls Day on the 31^st of Oct through the 1^st of Nov. Traditionally All Souls Day is great fiesta for Filipinos. It had been handed down from generation to generations. Filipino families gather themselves at the place where departed loved ones were laid to rest. Some would stay overnight from the 31^st of Oct. to the 1^st of Nov. To some however, they spend the vigil lavishly. Such that, some would bring wines and liquors, intoxicating themselves forgetting some wants to celebrate the occasion solemnly in prayers. To maintain peace and order, police officers are posted inside memorial parks and cemeteries. Bags are inspected from the entrance. Items like, karaoke, kitchen knives, playing cards are confiscated and returned to the owners upon leaving the area.

I visited my parents with my brother and sister in law, Monday 25^th of October. Good enough I heeded the advice of my sis in law. I filed vacation leave for Friday, 29^th of Oct. Lady luck did not smile at me. The vacation leave was not approved. The 1^st of Nov. is a holiday in the Philippines, but sad to say. No holiday for those working in Call Centers. The good news is we get additional pay working on Philippine holidays.